Thursday, February 10, 2011

Stuck

Yes I got stuck half way through my Love Dare.

It was the part about forgiveness.

If I was going to be honest with myself, forgiving my spouse and asking for forgiveness was going to take more than the two days allotted in the book. And I didn't think I could skip over it so I just put the book down at that point.

However, about the same time I started The Love Dare I joined a Freedom Session class. I had an idea that this class was going to lead me where I needed to go at a much deeper level.

And so it has. Based on a 12 step program we meet weekly for group DVD sessions and then break into our small groups for discussion and review of our homework. We dig into the hard stuff. It's all pretty honest.

Maybe it's the deep honesty that got me stuck. At this point in the class, we have made "a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves". We've listed all our hurts that come to mind and the people involved. We've listed all of those we've hurt. And then we read them out to a trusted sponsor.

Whew! It was actually very cleansing. I've done much of this already over the past few years but this is very thorough and has led me to process a lot of current dynamics in my life that are all interconnected.

In a way, I'm rather disapointed in myself. On the other hand........I'm being honest.....patient....submitting myself to the process. We'll see where that takes me.